It's Not Suppose to Be This Way

My arms are empty. My eyes do not see him. I do not hear his hungry cry throughout the house. I can't smell the baby shampoo that caressed his beautiful head. I can't taste his little fingers with my kisses.

It's not suppose to be this way.

Our Beloved Son

Ethan Matthew Anderson came to be with us at 10:19pm on Thursday, April 21, 2011. We were able to love on him for a short while before the Lord decided to take him Home. We are deeply saddened and grieving, yet find comfort in knowing he is safe, whole and we will be reunited. As tiny as he was, he had noticeable features of each parent. Most of his grandparents and some of his aunts and one uncle were able to meet him, along with two of our good friends. We have been surrounded with love, prayer, grieving, which have all helped comfort us and we appreciate all of you. We chose his name, Ethan, due to its meaning of 'strong' and 'perseverance'. His middle name was chosen after his father's name and its meaning 'gift from God'.

Things I Have Learned with Pregnancy

1. Drink a lot of water and that means more than you could ever imagine.

2. Have a strong community. Family and friends are absolutely vital during this time.

3. Pregnancy is truly a miracle. After 2 visits to the ER and 1 to Labor and Delivery (at 20 weeks gestation), I have not once received a concrete explanation to anything. It is in God's hands.

4. Always save financially for a rainy day as that day could last months.

5. Don't hesitate to call the doctor if something is worrying you.

6. Give in to your cravings with moderation.

7. If you feel tears coming on, just let it go and have a good cry, even if you don't know what you are crying about.

8. Talk, sing and dance with/to your ever growing belly. There is a little person in there and share all this with your spouse.

9. Hand-me-downs, borrowed items and consignment are a blessing! Also, your baby does not need every item you see on the shelf.

10. Pray.

Thank You, Lord!

Our backyard neighbor just came over and shared with me their oak tree was hit by lightning on Friday evening. Now, on Friday, when the lightning hit, I new it was close, but not that close. I was home alone and the strike set off our house alarm, which I was unable to switch off. So, my energy was geered toward speaking with customer service to solve the problem. Little did I know, our neighbors just had bark thrown through their living room windows, their irrigation system blew up around the tree and the wiring leading to the garage where those systems are controlled exploded AND it did the same to their garage doors. Good gracious! They were all safe, thank you, Lord! Also, thank you, Lord for mine and little guy's safety. When it happened, we were sitting in the room closest to the oak tree, about 150' away. I was wondering why there were chunks of tree on our deck and scattered throughout the backyard...in looking at the tree, there is an area from top to bottom where bark was sheared off from the force of the lightning. We are due for more severe storms this week and you will find me in the basement.

Thank You, Stranger

I would like to thank whichever previous owner, as there have been two, that planted the beautiful flowers in our yard. They not only make the yard look great, but they have contributed to my enjoyment of Spring. So, thank you very much!

Take That!

This past Friday, we were cited by our ever-loving and caring HOA that we needed to "refresh" the mulch in our yard. Well, I have been out of work for quite some time and our bugdet does not allow refreshing mulch. So, Matt and I put our heads and cellphone calculators together to figure out how to do this task in the most cost effective way. Well, when you pull up to a mulch wholesaler with a CRV, sans truck bed, you might get laughed at and handed a shovel. We can take it. They don't pay our bills. Actually, they were laughing because this is not the traditional way of doing things around their place, so maybe we taught them something. I doubt it, but we did beat the system by spending $30 rather than $100+ if someone had delivered it to our house or if we had used Home Depot, whose customer service lady was rude. Well, the yard does look better and Matt got his exercise. :)

Little Guy is Growing Like a Cute Weed

These newest photos were taken three weeks ago, so I know even now he has changed so much. I can feel him moving, which is fascinating and miraculous. He is very active and I'm pretty sure he has enrolled in a kickboxing class and sometimes attends up to twice a day.